Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Today we drove down to our storage unit in Eagle to gather our winter and ski gear. I bought us both Epic Passes which motivated Tony to need his gear ASAP. For the non-local, the Epic Pass allows you unlimited access to Vail, Beaver Creek, Breck, Keystone, A-Basin as well as 3 California mountains (maybe next year Pammer!). What could be more motivating for Tony than a first-class ski pass? I hope he gets to use it! One way or the other, it's money well spent.
We spent Thanksgiving with Wendy and Brian who cooked the perfect traditional dinner. I'm so sorry to my friends that I had hoped to visit with -- sorry Tracey, sorry Sondra, sorry Jamie. Thanks for the invites and i'm sorry we couldn't make the rounds like I'd hoped.
Thanksgiving GRACE:
I'm thankful for my friends and family and their unwielding support.
I'm thankful that Tony didn't have treatment this week and is getting time to recover.
I'm thankful for the beauty of the snow and the mountains of Vail that give me hope every day.
Good night.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Two Big Days on the Town
The last two days have probably been the most socially eventful for Tony that he's had in 10 weeks. For the most part, he's been stuck with me and the hospital staff for entertainment, and those awesome people who have made time to visit even when it's uncomfortable to do so. But he's been mostly lonely and bored silly. So thanks to the regular visitors, you know who you are.
Yesterday, Wendy Lew took Tony to pick out bathroom tile and groceries, and then they had tea at Starbucks. Who would have ever thought that something so simple would be an awesome day out? Well it was. Thanks Wendy!
Today, Rolly and Brandt took him to Loaded Joe's the local coffee shop, where Tony caught up with friends and shared his war wounds. Again, big day out!
These are the kind of days that most of us take for granted, but for Tony they were probably momentous.
Tomorrow we are onto Costco to load up on Gatorade, bottled water, protein drinks, paper towels and toilet paper, our most utilized home products these days. We are also going to visit our storage unit to see if we can dig out our ski stuff. The snow is hurling down and in case he's ever well enough, we need to be ready to go. Now that is a big day out!
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!
Yesterday, Wendy Lew took Tony to pick out bathroom tile and groceries, and then they had tea at Starbucks. Who would have ever thought that something so simple would be an awesome day out? Well it was. Thanks Wendy!
Today, Rolly and Brandt took him to Loaded Joe's the local coffee shop, where Tony caught up with friends and shared his war wounds. Again, big day out!
These are the kind of days that most of us take for granted, but for Tony they were probably momentous.
Tomorrow we are onto Costco to load up on Gatorade, bottled water, protein drinks, paper towels and toilet paper, our most utilized home products these days. We are also going to visit our storage unit to see if we can dig out our ski stuff. The snow is hurling down and in case he's ever well enough, we need to be ready to go. Now that is a big day out!
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!
Monday, November 22, 2010
Continued Treatment Postponed for 1 week
This morning (Monday) we met with both Rad Onc and Med Onc. They both suggest that Tony take this week to rest and for the effects of the last 6 weeks of treatment to kick in. So Tony will get this week off and hopefully regain some strength.
He'll be home all day every day -- please visit!
Next Monday we have a Cat Scan scheduled for Monday. Chemo scheduled for Tuesday morning. Additional radiation sessions are likely and Dr. Hardenberg is working on his new plan. Hopefully it will be short!
He'll be home all day every day -- please visit!
Next Monday we have a Cat Scan scheduled for Monday. Chemo scheduled for Tuesday morning. Additional radiation sessions are likely and Dr. Hardenberg is working on his new plan. Hopefully it will be short!
Ups and Downs Weekend
Friday was Tony's last day of radiation (from the original treatment plan) and we were both exhausted. By the time i got home from work all i wanted to do was cry and sleep. So I did. And as always, things were better in the morning.
Tony rested on Saturday while I did some work at the office and Saturday night we just chilled, just like every other Saturday night in the past 10 weeks :). A quick visit from Dana and Joel and friend Sara wrapped up the big evening.
Sunday brought lots of snow and a ray or two of hope. Tony was light on his feet, had his game face on, his sense of humor intact and beat me over and over at Wii Tennis and Bowling.
Sean Fraser came over for a visit to watch football which allowed me to get out for a little while and take care of business - a massage! Blessed Sean!
Tony rested on Saturday while I did some work at the office and Saturday night we just chilled, just like every other Saturday night in the past 10 weeks :). A quick visit from Dana and Joel and friend Sara wrapped up the big evening.
Sunday brought lots of snow and a ray or two of hope. Tony was light on his feet, had his game face on, his sense of humor intact and beat me over and over at Wii Tennis and Bowling.
Sean Fraser came over for a visit to watch football which allowed me to get out for a little while and take care of business - a massage! Blessed Sean!
Friday, November 19, 2010
Additional Radiation and Chemo may be required
Blogs are getting harder to write, because the days keep getting more difficult and it's hard to talk/write about. As i've expressed to close friends, i'm starting to lose my composure and positive attitude, and I'm sure Tony can sense this weakness in me.
Friday (today) was supposed to mark the end of 6 weeks of intensive treatment chemo and radiation, with the weeks and months ahead dedicated to rehabilitation and recovery.
Earlier this week the doctors gave us the disappointing news that they didn't think Tony's tumor had shrunk as much as they thought it should have given the very aggressive chemo and radiation plan. On Monday, we'll know if more treatment will be required but we're preparing for the additional treatment plan...
Another chemo treatment on November 30th is planned. Another 5 days of radiation is likely planned. The outcome is that likely Tony will require reconstructive surgery on his jaw within a couple of years, because the tumor is in such a place that they can't avoid the jaw while delivering the radiation and it will decompose.
As you can imagine this was devastating to Tony who thought Friday was the milestone day. Thus, a new level of depression, frustration and anger has set in.
For me, a deep level of guilt has overcome me as I try to work full-time and can't dedicate enough time to him during the day. Continued thanks to everyone who have taken and picked Tony up from radiation sessions-- this week Wendy, Dennis and Rolly.
I must express incredible gratitude to the Shaw Cancer Center staff who has provided us with so much support only a daily basis-- in particular Vanessa, Susan, Katie, Marisella, Leeza, Krista, Natalie, Chris, Mary, Claudia, Pharmacists August, Susie, Sue and of course Drs. Hardenberg and Urquhart. Apologies to radiation staff with which i have less interaction and can't name by name. Everyone has been amazing.
Well TGIF and tomorrow is another day.
Friday (today) was supposed to mark the end of 6 weeks of intensive treatment chemo and radiation, with the weeks and months ahead dedicated to rehabilitation and recovery.
Earlier this week the doctors gave us the disappointing news that they didn't think Tony's tumor had shrunk as much as they thought it should have given the very aggressive chemo and radiation plan. On Monday, we'll know if more treatment will be required but we're preparing for the additional treatment plan...
Another chemo treatment on November 30th is planned. Another 5 days of radiation is likely planned. The outcome is that likely Tony will require reconstructive surgery on his jaw within a couple of years, because the tumor is in such a place that they can't avoid the jaw while delivering the radiation and it will decompose.
As you can imagine this was devastating to Tony who thought Friday was the milestone day. Thus, a new level of depression, frustration and anger has set in.
For me, a deep level of guilt has overcome me as I try to work full-time and can't dedicate enough time to him during the day. Continued thanks to everyone who have taken and picked Tony up from radiation sessions-- this week Wendy, Dennis and Rolly.
I must express incredible gratitude to the Shaw Cancer Center staff who has provided us with so much support only a daily basis-- in particular Vanessa, Susan, Katie, Marisella, Leeza, Krista, Natalie, Chris, Mary, Claudia, Pharmacists August, Susie, Sue and of course Drs. Hardenberg and Urquhart. Apologies to radiation staff with which i have less interaction and can't name by name. Everyone has been amazing.
Well TGIF and tomorrow is another day.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Oops i've forgotten to blog!
Followers of CANCER SUCKS, I'm so sorry! Work has cranked up in anticipation of the ski season and between treatments and work, I've been negligent in my responsibilities to you all!
Short version... Chemo on Tuesday lasted all day long. Rough on Tony. It snowed that day so we watched it come down from the Chemo Room. Thanks to Ed O'Brien for the brief visit that lasted 1.5 hours.
Thursday was the double radiation day. Tough one but Tony was willing and able. Thanks to Rolly for the ride in the afternoon and thanks to Dennis for a few early morning rides this week.
Friday marked the end of Week 5. According to the "PLAN" Chemo is complete and Tony only has 1 week of radiation left... 6 sessions. Per the plan, this should zap the cancer... but there is a little waiting game for a few weeks while the full effects of the treatment take effect.
Nausea following chemo seems to be better managed this time with anti-nausea meds. Phlegm is super bad this weekend, makes your gag reflex kick in to hear it :) Neck is sore and raw and a bit dry from the radiaton so we're wrapping it up in Petroleum wraps which take the bite out a little bit.
On a positive note, he wants to eat so badly (with his mouth instead of his tube) that he asked for pancakes on Friday night. Didn't get much down but at least he tried. Request for Banana Pudding on Saturday, another brave attempt. Still hating the tube feeding and hard to get him to comply with the nutritionists requests of 6 cans a day. If anyone visits and/or talks to him please encourage him to get the calories and protein needed to get through the next couple of weeks. It's still going to get harder before the healing begins.
Good night and THINK SNOW!
Sandie
Short version... Chemo on Tuesday lasted all day long. Rough on Tony. It snowed that day so we watched it come down from the Chemo Room. Thanks to Ed O'Brien for the brief visit that lasted 1.5 hours.
Thursday was the double radiation day. Tough one but Tony was willing and able. Thanks to Rolly for the ride in the afternoon and thanks to Dennis for a few early morning rides this week.
Friday marked the end of Week 5. According to the "PLAN" Chemo is complete and Tony only has 1 week of radiation left... 6 sessions. Per the plan, this should zap the cancer... but there is a little waiting game for a few weeks while the full effects of the treatment take effect.
Nausea following chemo seems to be better managed this time with anti-nausea meds. Phlegm is super bad this weekend, makes your gag reflex kick in to hear it :) Neck is sore and raw and a bit dry from the radiaton so we're wrapping it up in Petroleum wraps which take the bite out a little bit.
On a positive note, he wants to eat so badly (with his mouth instead of his tube) that he asked for pancakes on Friday night. Didn't get much down but at least he tried. Request for Banana Pudding on Saturday, another brave attempt. Still hating the tube feeding and hard to get him to comply with the nutritionists requests of 6 cans a day. If anyone visits and/or talks to him please encourage him to get the calories and protein needed to get through the next couple of weeks. It's still going to get harder before the healing begins.
Good night and THINK SNOW!
Sandie
Monday, November 8, 2010
Chemo Session Tuesday
Tony has his second chemotherapy session tomorrow. Last time it lasted almost 5 hours, so we're anticipating a long day at the hospital beginning with radiation at 9:30 am. We're supposed to have a major winter storm tomorrow... we'll be watching it from the Shaw Cancer Center with a view of the mountains... Yes, there are still some good things in life :)
His skin is starting to look very burnt on the outside, like a third degree burn.... boooooo.... They've given us a special cream to cover his neck and face and today there were some blisters after the radiation therapy. I can't imagine what it must feel like from the inside. He's finally succumbed to the pain killers...
Which brings us to the constant struggle to eat and drink and now... trouble swallowing. All food and fluids continue to be consumed through the feeding tube. He's not getting enough calories according to the nurses... of the 6 cans he should have daily, he's only getting about 3 down. You can lead the horse to water.... yeah, you got it. Tony is the horse.
If you are reading, please send good vibes to Tony all day tomorrow, he is going to need them. Visitors are welcome at the Shaw Cancer Center -- it's actually a nice place to visit if you are in the neighborhood anytime tomorrow. He gets a private room with his own tv and the actual treatment doesn't hurt or make him sick. The days following.... well, they will be rough for a while.
Goodnight! Sandie
His skin is starting to look very burnt on the outside, like a third degree burn.... boooooo.... They've given us a special cream to cover his neck and face and today there were some blisters after the radiation therapy. I can't imagine what it must feel like from the inside. He's finally succumbed to the pain killers...
Which brings us to the constant struggle to eat and drink and now... trouble swallowing. All food and fluids continue to be consumed through the feeding tube. He's not getting enough calories according to the nurses... of the 6 cans he should have daily, he's only getting about 3 down. You can lead the horse to water.... yeah, you got it. Tony is the horse.
If you are reading, please send good vibes to Tony all day tomorrow, he is going to need them. Visitors are welcome at the Shaw Cancer Center -- it's actually a nice place to visit if you are in the neighborhood anytime tomorrow. He gets a private room with his own tv and the actual treatment doesn't hurt or make him sick. The days following.... well, they will be rough for a while.
Goodnight! Sandie
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Double Down Thursday
Getting radiation in the morning, then going home and going to sleep, and then waking up again in time for another treatment in the afternoon. That is called "Tony Thursdays" so no more complaining about Hump Day Wednesdays, okay!
This is the 4th week of treatment, so only 2 of those Thursdays still ahead. Thanks to Tracey for carpooling this afternoon, I actually got some work done today!
The doc says things are going well this week. Skin is getting really dry from the radiation, so we got a special cream for Tony's neck. Whatever he doesn't use, i'll try on my wrinkles once he's finished treatment :) ( I'm going to HELL!)
We are both thinking about next week when Tony will get his next Chemo dose. It will be a very long day resulting in days of nausea afterwards.
We are in the home stretch for treatment but recovery will last for many months -- TBD depending on Tony's physical, physiological and emotional determination. Cross you fingers and say your prayers (to whomever or whatever) that it will be over soon.
TGIF and FAC -- Sandie
This is the 4th week of treatment, so only 2 of those Thursdays still ahead. Thanks to Tracey for carpooling this afternoon, I actually got some work done today!
The doc says things are going well this week. Skin is getting really dry from the radiation, so we got a special cream for Tony's neck. Whatever he doesn't use, i'll try on my wrinkles once he's finished treatment :) ( I'm going to HELL!)
We are both thinking about next week when Tony will get his next Chemo dose. It will be a very long day resulting in days of nausea afterwards.
We are in the home stretch for treatment but recovery will last for many months -- TBD depending on Tony's physical, physiological and emotional determination. Cross you fingers and say your prayers (to whomever or whatever) that it will be over soon.
TGIF and FAC -- Sandie
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Retraction - Tumor is Getting Smaller!
Yesterday Tony had an ultrasound which showed that the tumor IS SHRINKING!
The results showed that the tumor mass was originally 4.5 x 3.5 x 4.5 and now measures 3 x 1.3 x 2.4 !!!
The forementioned "growth" in a blog from last week is a result of inflammation associated with the tumor dying and the surrounding areas being a bit inlfamed from the radiation.
This is the best news we have had in a while and puts us back on track with the original treatment plan.
The antibody proposed by the Chemo Doc may be declined by the Case Management/Insurance company. Apparently several clinical studies were closed due to safety concerns... more as we learn more tomorrow.
On an interesting note! Dr Hardenberg was out of the office this week and a Dr. Tim Thar was filling in from Florida! Turns out he did his residency at the University of Florida in Gainesville and was there at the same time that my dad was doing his Cardio-Thoracic residency. Small World!
What a beautiful day! Welcome Pam O'Brien -- can't wait to see you.
Sandie
The results showed that the tumor mass was originally 4.5 x 3.5 x 4.5 and now measures 3 x 1.3 x 2.4 !!!
The forementioned "growth" in a blog from last week is a result of inflammation associated with the tumor dying and the surrounding areas being a bit inlfamed from the radiation.
This is the best news we have had in a while and puts us back on track with the original treatment plan.
The antibody proposed by the Chemo Doc may be declined by the Case Management/Insurance company. Apparently several clinical studies were closed due to safety concerns... more as we learn more tomorrow.
On an interesting note! Dr Hardenberg was out of the office this week and a Dr. Tim Thar was filling in from Florida! Turns out he did his residency at the University of Florida in Gainesville and was there at the same time that my dad was doing his Cardio-Thoracic residency. Small World!
What a beautiful day! Welcome Pam O'Brien -- can't wait to see you.
Sandie
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